Two things, and then I will totally shut up.
1. I just officiated an argument between two people speaking Chinese. One of the two arguing was an American male who learned his Chinese in an unknown fashion. The other person is an older woman who moved here from China about 10 years ago. They were disagreeing on the proper way to say something in Chinese. Lulu was trying to say it was cold out, and Sean kept telling her she was using the wrong word. Finally I intervened. "Sean," I said. Lulu is from China. You're not. I'm going to go with her on this one." Sheesh.
2. I met a friend of a friend today. He owns a company that produces radio jingles in Europe. Radio jingles. How cool. That's something I've always been interested in doing, since my singing career pretty much petered out in the 90s with ONE backing vocal on ONE record. Whatever. So anyway, besides the fact this this guy seems pretty cool, he also does something I'm really interested in pursuing at some point, so I'd like to make sure this is a contact that remains fresh. But I'm wracking my brain all day trying to figure out why he looks *so* familiar. Uh...just figured it out. Back in the 90s, I slept with his younger brother. And oh yeah, for good measure, the drummer in one of his bands too. Compared to my friends, I was SOOOOOO far from slutty. But I hung out with girls who had competitions to see who could sleep with the most boys in a single summer. One summer the results were Jen: 46, Lauren: 42, Mel: 33. Kelli and I refused to play. Mel was crushed. She always thought of herself as prettier than Lauren. Dear god. Like its about looks, at that point. Man. Is it any surprise that the only one I'm still friends with is Kelli?
But I digress. I never thought of myself as slutty (formerly, obviously. I've been married and monogamous for more than a decade). But the other day I was talking with a coworker and I said something along the lines of "You know when you accidentally sleep with someone..." She stopped me right there. "Accidentally sleep with someone?" she says incredulously. "Yeah," I say. "You know, when you never thought in a million years that you would ever sleep with *that person* but then you start drinking a bit, and the music gets louder, and suddenly the next thing you know...." Brenda just looks at me and then bursts out laughing, like I'm kidding. Uhhhh.....
Now this. How weird. I don't think this guy will remember me. I look a lot different after 10 years and two kids. I only remember him because both he and his brother are very distinctive looking. I don't even know if his brother is still alive. Everyone was kind of wild back then. Not everybody made it, and I didn't keep track of very many of them, once I grew up.
So maybe I was sluttier than I thought. Perhaps hanging out with serious pass around girls allowed me to overlook my own shortcomings in that area. Or maybe not. Maybe it's just a couple of incidents that have cropped up very close together. Hmm. The jury is out on this one. I think for good.
You can quote me - New Leaf has an All Hands On Deck meeting once a week to plot world domination, and stalking of snacks. We open the meeting with an invocation to the book...
12 hours ago